Our street-level cricket team needed one more guy
Our street-level cricket team needed one more guy to complete the team size. So they called me to join their team.
And of course, they never gave me a chance to bat or bowl. One day, I asked my team captain if I can get a chance to bat (Or at least to bowl).
He said that he can't risk losing the game(as if... that was a world cup final) by giving a chance to me.
So... I had no other option but to wait for the other batsmen to get out. I continued being a part of my team... and used to say
"best half luck"
to the top-order batsmen.
And as you might have guessed it, my eternal wait continued to the Infinity and beyond .
And I had some really interesting observations.
Some times my team used to win and some times our opposite team used to win. Everybody in the winning team used to feel happy. And everybody in the
losing team used to feel sad/disappointed.
Well... you know... except me.
My contribution to my team was same as my contribution to the opposite team. "Nothing".
So... I was confused if I had the right to share the happiness of the winning team or the sadness of the losing team.
One day, I got a rare oppurtunity to collect the ball before it crosses the boundary. I made two or three attempts to collect it.
But it somehow missed my hands and crossed the boundary. And my opposite team had won the match.
For the first time in my life, my captain came to me for a little on-field-chat. He shouted at me that he lost the match because of me.
And then the opposite team captain came to thank me as his team has won the match in the last-ball... because of me. (probably he was humiliating me).
I was ignorant enough to understand... only what he has said (but not what he meant).
The whole game was changed because of me. How cool was that !!!!!
May be I should really thank that opposite team captain. It was the initial days of my computer programing lessons.
And I realized that programing gives me a chance to play a game where everything changes because of me.
But I later learnt that I was only partially-correct.
I grew up, became a game programer and I was working on games.
Whenever I asked if I ever get a chance to create something, somebody said that he can't risk losing a deadline/budget-schedule/quality.
- I wanted to create my own font. My director preferred 3rd party font.
- I wanted to create my own matrix library. My manager preferred 3rd party library.
- I wanted to create my own game engine. My boss preferred 3rd party game-engine.
And that sounded painfully similar to my childhood cricket-team-captain's words.
Of course... I might be re-inventing a wheel. I might be taking years to create something (given my laziness).
I might be coming up with the worst possible code. But at least I'm creating something.
To stay away from the feeling that
programing is no more fun
is one of the main reasons to create this blog.
FOOTNOTES: I happend to come across few weird people. They are addicted to "judging people".
If someone posts/blogs something, these weird people start reading in between the lines and jump into conclusions.
These footnotes are created to save myself from their stupid conclusions.
1. I know that the team's needs come first before individuals's interest/fun.
Every person should think about the team and the team should think about the individual. Now stop judging me already that I'm not a team player. The story was about a 10 year old kid.
Any ways... why does an individual join a team? Think about it.
2. I agree that I when I'm taking money from a company, my work should be aligned to the company's goals. I don't mix my profession and personal-aspirations. However, there is something called "job satisfaction". What about it?
KRK Jaya Prakash © 2012